The Good Old Days

People keep telling me to make these days last; these are the good old days. It's funny to me, because I always thought that I had passed my good old days. Those days that I look back on fondly, aren't those the good old days? Apparently not. Apparently these are my good old days. days which are neither all too good, or old at all, in the scheme of things thus far. In fact, these are my most recent days, and at best they're good, not great, certainly not noteworthy.
So that leads to only one possible conclusion: there are no good old days. There, I said it. You know what though? I'm perfectly fine with that idea. What good would it do me to have the ability to reminisce about days long since past? How would that benefit me in any way? Instead of singly out a few days or years or what-have-you, why don't I just remember them as a whole, my collective past, if you will. Indeed, that would be better.
Instead of living in the past, and wishing for a return to the good old days, I can take my lessons from every day long since passed, and move on with my life, enjoying each day as it comes. Why can't the rest of you do this? Why resist the inevitable change and struggle to reassert old, dead days and ways? Come on, you know as well as I do that the good old days are a lie. They're just a collection of memories which, over the years, you have glorified and made into something that they never were.
Face it, your good old days were never all that good. Life was still hard; it still sucked just as much. The only difference is that now you have a better understanding of those days, something which you did not have back then. So, in reality, you were just as fucked back then as you are now. You reminisce because hindsight is 20/20. That's all it boils down to.

Sorry old friends, but you're not so much different than me. Get off your high horse. Face the facts that life has always been hard, and you've always been unsure of yourself. You've always struggled and you always will. The past is only an older version of the present and the future, just with fewer neat gadgets, and everything was in black and white, or sepia tone, as the case may be.

Embrace the new days, the ones beyond technicolour, the ones even beyond today. Embrace tomorrow, and give up on the past. Just let go already, because you'll never get it back.

And trust me, if you could, you wouldn't want it anyway.

That Last Was Weak

So it was me being lazy, but wanting to post something none the less.
Woop. Anyway, I'm graduating soon. My last day is Wednesday, graduation on the 24th. I'm looking forward to it. I have to admit though, I'm a bit stressed; what's new? I don't have a job yet. I'm not sure how much money I'll make this summer, hopefully enough to pay for college. If not, loans here I come... I'm also just a bit scared of leaving school. It's all I've known, all my life. It's almost like a security blanket that I'm finally going to have to deal without. For the first time in my life, I won't be coming back to school after the summer. It's weird, scary and exciting, but most of all, I'm hit by unending melancholy. It seems to be the dominant emotion of my life. Melancholy. It's better than sorrow or fear I suppose. I've always got good times to remember, old friends to think about, amazing adventures that I'll never forget. Every time I think about my past though, I just get a little bit sad too. I know it won't be back, but I wish it would. So much. There is so much I wish I could experience again, so much I wish i could have done differently, knowing what I know now. I've always felt a little like I missed out on a true childhood, and it never bothered me too much, but now that I'm faced with becoming an adult, I'm scared shitless. I'm scared and I wish I could have had more time as a kid.

Just a few more years.
Please...